Don’t Let Life Get In Your Way.

I am not what happened to me. I am what I choose to become.

I came across these words the other day from a meme on Instagram. The timing was fortuitous as a colleague I had just spoken to encouraged me to blog about the following story.

There’s no great build up. There’s no surprise ending. This is not a sob story, nor is it a poor me story. 

I had a heart transplant. It was August 30, 2016, thanks to a young man who decided life and death are not equal.

Across my now nearly 17 year journey, not one time have I ever said why me. True story. Now, that does not mean that I was pleased with the cause of the trajectory my life suddenly took on September 17th, 2004. I decided it just is what it is.

I threw myself into treatments, medicines, and hope. And moving forward led to wonderful things. Because of my situation, I made choices too many to list that otherwise would not have been made. They led to this: I met a girl, the girl. After three months I asked her to marry me and 12 years later we have 4 beautiful, yet, shall we say, rambunctious, children. We’ve traveled, dealt with misfortune, and with luck as well.

I started a photography studio, following a long held, but at one time, unexpected dream. It’s challenging and rewarding, when I’m not dealing with the rambunctious ones. 

And then one day I got the most amazing call of my life. Perhaps I’ll write about that sometime.

My message is simple, and it is this: you do not have to let any one, two, or many experiences in your life control or define you. I’m a transplant survivor who take meds twice a day forever, gets tests several times a year, and so far, gets hospitalized four times a year. But that is all just a means to an end.

 All of that allows me to be a father, a husband, and a photographer. It just is what it is. You define you; no one else. It’s all in how you choose to let your experiences shape your life.